Train Under Water

Walking barefoot back in the rain tonight with the guys I laughed at how appropriate their jokes were as they snickered behind my back. "I mean you gotta remember where she's from, bro." Aside from the stereotype side of the joke it made me feel like I was back home and it made me realize I really do have a good group of friends up here. As soon as they start making fun of me I know they're for real. (I can see W, B, K, and J laughing right now at how glad they are that other people realize how much of a dork I really am)

Today was again, a really good day. I stayed busy at work, which was a nice change of pace from last week's dawdling days of binding and facebook stalking. And it wasn't an annoying busy but a fun busy with interesting and relevant things to do. The day actually went by fast and soon it was time to leave, and as I sat staring at my reflection in the window of the subway it finally hit me. The realization I've been waiting for months to smack me over the head finally came today as I sat on the V train heading downtown with no speakers in ears because my iPod was charging back at the dorm. It wasn't a thunderous, loud, clapping realization. But instead it was soft and subtle and no longer surreal. I am in New York City. I am nineteen years old and spending my summer in New York City. I have the freedom to wander and explore and make new friends and visit new places. I get to see the city in all it's glory without time or travel restraints. And it took me this long to figure that out. But I'm glad I finally did. It doesn't mean that my official summer in New York is about to begin, that started long ago. It just means (I think) that I finally understand the opportunity and blessing this is, and I'm finally truly grateful. So much happened to me before I left, in so many different areas of my life, that instead of coming to New York, I was running away from Mississippi. But that's not what I'm thinking about any more. Now I'm in New York, truly, deeply in it. I've fallen in love with the city. With its people, its places, its sounds, its smells. So many lives inhabiting one small island, so many pages unwritten, unread, and I want to read them all. I want to write them all.

-Mandy